Corrupt a wish (Bringin' it back)

Your cardboard never arrives.

I wish for another Jiang Shi.

 

Who the fuck is that? Nobody knows thus we cant grant it

I wish for my fucking PC to hurry up installing all the new shit (Wooo new PC hype)

 

(You don't have to know what it is...)

The PC breaks.

I wish for some Tea.

 

You get coffee

I wish fictional characters were real

 

Fictional characters already real :3

I wish for steak

 

Jeremy kills you for asking for such a thing

I wish I wasn't so lazy

 

You become not lazy, but you die from doing too much work.

I wish for a good camera

 

You get a good camera. A very good camera. A camera so good, that the pictures it takes are of such high resolution, that eyes cannot perceive it. Therefore, you got a new paperweight. A very, very expensive paperweight.

I wish for butterscotch pie.

 

You get it but the pie is stale.
I wish for no school today

 

I dare not corrupt a wish everyone has.


I again wish for a national pun day.

 

Puns become a religious sin and if you say them you have to suffer the consequences.

I wish for Remembrance day to be a holiday.

 

Remembrance Day becomes a holiday but gets canceled every year.

I wish to get 100% on all my tests forever

 

You only get 99% on your test which then kills your OCD

I wish for a pink pony :3

 

you get a magenta pony

i wish that all the animals in the animal shelters and stray animals get homes because i feel bad for them and i wanna adopt them all ;u;

 

You only get to adopt one and it dies 1 day later.

I wish for a typewriter that's not broken and it will never break. It also has a magical backspace button.

 

Congratulations! You have acquired the Indestructable Typewriter! .... Thing is, the typewriter... It couldn't have many moving parts in order to be indestructible, so you literally got a big chunk of metal with a moving space button. Also the space button summons magical pugs which bring you magical tacos, so I guess that's ok.

I wish for a sausage.

 

When you try to eat the sausage, a dog comes and steals the sausage away from you.

I wish for tea actually I want coffee but I wanna see if anyone will actually give me coffee so this is a fake wish

 

You get tea, but it's poisoned.

I wish for an axe to kill certain people.

 

The axe mysteriously appears, and goes to kill the certain people. But wait! You are a certain person too! (sounds of brutal slashes and bone breaking can be heard)

I wish for an honest politician.
Oh wait, that wish is corrupted enough as it is.

 

A politician that's honest is impossible to find.
I wish for some Earl Grey tea.